The Journey to Buying a House in Japan Pt.1

The noble quest of purchasing a house in Japan as a foreigner – a journey fraught with more twists and turns than a Shibuya intersection during rush hour. Strap on your katana, for my own saga began a mere year ago, brimming with hope and promptly squashed by a barrage of rejection letters. In the Land of the Rising Sun, obtaining a mortgage as a non-native is akin to trying to teach a cat to sing “Single Ladies” by Beyonce – virtually impossible. Picture this: to even sniff at a mortgage approval, you must boast an annual income that could rival the GDP of a small island nation, especially if you dare venture beyond the neon glow of Tokyo. Smaller cities? Well, they're about as appealing to banks as a sushi roll with ketchup – high-risk and liable to leave them with a sour taste if you decide to skip town.

My foray into this real estate rodeo kicked off around mid-2021, armed with nothing but a dream and a smartphone loaded with property listings. I scoured the digital landscape for affordable condos and cozy abodes, hoping to strike gold amidst the rubble of pandemic-induced market chaos. Lo and behold, I stumbled upon a three-bedroom condo near a train station – a steal at a mere $200k, courtesy of the coronavirus discount. But like a sneaky ninja hiding in the shadows, these seemingly perfect options came with a catch: maintenance fees that could rival the national debt. Then, amidst the sea of disappointment, a beacon of hope emerged – a four-bedroom house with a yard big enough to host a sumo wrestling tournament. But alas, every bank we approached greeted us with the skepticism usually reserved for UFO sightings – "Are you a permanent resident or just passing through like a lost tourist?" At the time, I was neither – just a humble foreigner with dreams of homeownership and a penchant for sake.

Enter my trusty companion, now my spouse, as we embarked on a whirlwind romance to beat the property market's ticking clock. Faced with the urgency of the situation, we decided to skip the traditional lovey-dovey engagement and dive straight into matrimonial bliss. After all, if we were going to commit to this wild ride, why not make it official with matching wedding rings and a mortgage application? And thus, armed with vows and blueprints, we continued our quest with newfound vigor.

Then, like a treasure map leading to buried gold, we stumbled upon a plot of land so vast it could house Godzilla and his extended family. Nestled near the mountains and priced at a mere $80,000, it was a steal of epic proportions. With stars in our eyes and dreams of domestic bliss, we teamed up with Herbar House – our guides through the labyrinth of Japanese real estate. Their representative, a veritable samurai of salesmanship, fought tooth and nail to secure our plot, battling rival suitors like a warrior defending his honor. And thus, amidst the chaos and uncertainty, our Japanese homeownership adventure unfolded – a tale filled with more drama, twists, and unexpected turns than a primetime soap opera. But in the end, it was a journey worth embarking upon – a quest that transformed us from mere mortals into homeowners in the Land of the Rising Sun.

The house exterior in the contract booklet.

Navigating the intricacies of the house company's bureaucracy turned out to be a bit like trying to fold origami blindfolded – challenging, to say the least. Weekends became synonymous with marathon meetings, as we diligently hashed out the minutiae of our prospective abode for a solid two months. Surprisingly, this part of the process felt like a leisurely stroll in the cherry blossom-filled park compared to what awaited us next. The real trial by fire came when the house company decided to consult with the bank about our mortgage application. Despite my newfound status as a spouse to a Japanese national, the bank seemed about as eager to greenlight our mortgage as a cat is to take a bath. Faced with this bureaucratic brick wall, my wife did what any sensible person would do – she called in the cavalry in the form of her sister, the powerhouse entrepreneur.

House 1F. It has a bedroom, kitchen, living room, dining room, bathroom, toilet, pantry, laundry room, and entrance closet — traditional of Japanese houses.

House 2F. It has 3 bedrooms and a toilet.

Now, let's talk about crossing the Rubicon of Japanese mortgage approvals – a journey fraught with more hurdles than a ninja obstacle course. With the bank playing hard to get faster than you can say "sake," it quickly became evident that our dreams of homeownership hung in the balance. Enter my wife's sister, a titan of industry in her own right, along with her husband, ready to swoop in and save the day. As they graciously agreed to become my guarantors, the bank's tune miraculously changed from a dissonant cacophony to the sweet melody of approval. And just like that, we were back in business – well, as long as we had a couple of multi-million-dollar guarantors in our corner. So, the moral of the story? Want a mortgage in Japan? Either marry into wealth or befriend a tycoon's sibling. After all, in the high-stakes game of Japanese real estate, it's not about what you know but who you know – preferably someone with a fat wallet and a heart of gold.